i often pause and shake my weary head,
reflecting back on the life that i’ve lead,
pondering on past days and all my young years,
and battles i’ve gone through to finally get here;
i smile at my innocent childhood in Fiji,
and times growing up in big Melbourne city,
i recall many dark clouds that life harshly dealt,
they wade my existence like one tangled web;
i remember a moment so wild and vivid,
i was young, naive and only turned fourteen,
the world i thought i knew had another twist,
as i stood in front of her, and
a kinship, i didn’t know, who looked so much like me;
i was dealt a card fairly heavy,
there are so many in my life to keep happy,
countless hearts and souls to behold,
i definitely am stretched from pillar to post.
as i still my mind to search my heart,
a strength endures – that being LOVE.
i love the dawn of a new day and every moment i’m awake,
i love every chance i get to be a better self,
i love my husband to death, forever as one,
i love my family that raised me, especially my mum;
i love this new chapter that balances my past,
i love these fresh moments with those of my blood,
i love how some memories are making us one,
i love when my birth mum holds me in her arms;
love is the strength that keeps my head up,
it quietens my mind as i give of my heart,
i count it a blessing from heaven above,
that i have so many whom i call ‘whanau’.
“Love Endures through Hardships”, by Miriam Ratu.
* ‘whanau‘ is a multi-faceted community of family, related families and extended family.
This poem paints the journey of how I felt, when I found out at 14 years old, that I was adopted. I had no idea beforehand. It has taken over 2 decades since then to arrive at this peaceful place where I feel blessed to be able to balance my loving family that brought me up and my blood family whom I’m getting to know.
*** Artwork on permission by Giselle Ukardi ***